World Suicide Prevention Day 2016 is around the corner!
Suicide is not something new in Malaysia. Even though Malaysia is not in the top ranking of high rates of suicide cases, the statistics shown is quite alarming. It is reported that 16 out of 100,000 Malaysian population committed suicide. The reasons may be due to depression and substance abuse. The sad thing about this is that it can be prevented. This post is meant to educate Malaysian people about depression and also to inspire people with depression that you are not alone in this.
What is a depression?
Depression (major depressive disorder or clinical depression) is a common but serious mood disorder. It causes severe symptoms that affect how you feel, think, and handle daily activities, such as sleeping, eating, or working. (National Institute of Mental Health)
Let's get things straight. I am here to validate that depression is a real thing and you are not alone in this. It is not a mere sadness or stress or an excuse. It's actually more than that. It's really sad when someone denies your disorder and says that it's all in your head. For someone who is not in that person's shoes might say something like 'Mengada ngada lah kau, banyak lagi benda lain nak fikir', 'Itupun nak stress?', 'Fikir positif dah lah'.
These are probably the underlying problems that we Malaysians have. Kita suka cakap lepas and we don't really care about their emotional states. So people with depression tend not to show their emotions publicly because they feel like nobody cares. Therefore, they bottle up their problems and emotions and eventually it accumulates into something called depression.
I think it's the lack of understanding of what depression is all about. For me, some us Malaysians are uneducated about this disorder. Some people even mistaken it as a stress when it's a completely two different things. It's also a taboo thing to talk and we don't really want to take it seriously because we would associate this with religious stuffs which also explains why Malays have the lowest rates of suicide cases.
I think it's the lack of understanding of what depression is all about. For me, some us Malaysians are uneducated about this disorder. Some people even mistaken it as a stress when it's a completely two different things. It's also a taboo thing to talk and we don't really want to take it seriously because we would associate this with religious stuffs which also explains why Malays have the lowest rates of suicide cases.
Saying something like, 'Get over it' to a depressed person is like saying, 'Alaa, cancer je pun. Apa lah sangat' to a person with a cancer. It's not okay.
Depression is not something you can 'get over it' just like that. It comes and goes. If you know someone who is having this disorder, you might notice these signs that will be discussed below. All I can tell is that they're not obvious. Many people with depression do not go around and say, 'hai, saya ada depression'. No. They don't even want to talk about it, they feel ashamed and have this feeling where no one bothers about their problems.
Signs of depression:
1. Persistent sad, anxious, or “empty” mood
As I mentioned earlier, depression is not just a mere sadness and it usually lasts for at least two weeks. One episode you just crying your eyeballs out and another episode you feel absolutely nothing at all. I have times where I would like to call it as a 'meltdown moment' where I just cried without any apparent reasons and there are other days where you cried for hours and just staring blankly at walls after that, as if you are numb and lost. And of course, depression is not always about crying. Sometimes you just don't feel anything, like you are missing something but you don't know what is. There's no explanation to it.
I notice how some people would always point out the obvious solution instead of extending their hand to help someone who actually needs help. Here's a fun fact: people with depression is not stupid. They know that they should 'snap out of it' (as they'd like it to call) but they just can't and all you can do is give them some space but also to be there for them when in need.
2. Feelings of hopelessness, or pessimism
There are times when you just feel hopeless and as if you're anticipating for the worse.
3. Feelings of guilt, worthlessness, or helplessness
There are also times when you feel worthless, like you don't belong in the 'circle' and you always have to blame yourself. You're starting to doubt yourself even more.
4. Loss of interest or pleasure in hobbies and activities
You don't find pleasure in all activities that you used to love to do. You find that the tasks are hard enough to accomplish. Believe it or not, even getting out of the bed and walk to the bathroom is a small achievement for depressed people and most people tend to accuse them of being 'lazy'. Seriously, the stigma needs to die. They are not lazy, they just don't feel motivated and that is not an excuse, believe me.
5. Decreased energy or fatigue
You feel like your energy has been sucked out without even doing anything. Hence, the following sign.
6. Difficulty concentrating, remembering, or making decisions
You tried so hard to focus on your task but you just can't.
7. Difficulty sleeping, early-morning awakening, or oversleeping
Your sleeping schedule is f-ed up. Sometimes you have a difficulty sleeping at night. You try to shut your eyes and counting sheep in your head. But really, you have so many thoughts on your mind that you began to stare at the walls and think (or sometimes not). You just stare at it until you feel exhausted and still you cannot sleep. And when you finally CAN sleep, you sleep it through the day. You feel as if it's an escape. You just don't want to think about it anymore.
8. Appetite and/or weight changes
I often times don't eat when I'm depressed. It's not that I don't want to. It's just that I don't have the appetite to eat. I don't even feel hungry at all. I could go on without lunch and dinner when I'm depressed and I would go to sleep with an empty tummy and I feel absolutely nothing. But on days where I do eat, it would be in a small amount. But some people would overeat just so they could get away from the stress.
9. Aches or pains, headaches, cramps, or digestive problems without a clear physical cause and/or that do not ease even with treatment
It's pretty common when you're having depression.
10. Thoughts of death or suicide, or suicide attempts
If you knew someone or you're having this sign, please seek treatments immediately.
This is probably a taboo thing to discuss because it involves life and taking away your own life especially for us Muslims is something that is forbidden in Islam. But this can also cause a cognitive dissonance; you know it's forbidden but you can't help but think or attempt to do it. People often mistaken depressed people. They are being judgmental and to some extent verbally condemning them. Words can kill sometimes. It's already hard enough on their part, why would you add the burden that's already there? For someone to find suicide as their only solution just because of the pressure from their surroundings or the indifference feelings that people have to care and listen to their problems is sad. I mean, it can be prevented. You can always give a moral support. You can always help them emotionally. For me, having a thought of death or attempting suicide is a cry for help. They don't even want to do it because they want to die. They want to end the pain.
This is probably a taboo thing to discuss because it involves life and taking away your own life especially for us Muslims is something that is forbidden in Islam. But this can also cause a cognitive dissonance; you know it's forbidden but you can't help but think or attempt to do it. People often mistaken depressed people. They are being judgmental and to some extent verbally condemning them. Words can kill sometimes. It's already hard enough on their part, why would you add the burden that's already there? For someone to find suicide as their only solution just because of the pressure from their surroundings or the indifference feelings that people have to care and listen to their problems is sad. I mean, it can be prevented. You can always give a moral support. You can always help them emotionally. For me, having a thought of death or attempting suicide is a cry for help. They don't even want to do it because they want to die. They want to end the pain.
I was diagnosed with a depression not very long ago. I didn't know I had one until I was warded into a hospital. I've been struggling with depression for many years and it's not something that I asked for. It comes uninvited. I think it's important for people with depression to sit down and talk to someone and I also think that people should be more aware of their surroundings. Your father, mother, siblings, neighbor, best friend, roommate might have a depression but they just don't come out publicly and declare that they have it. If you notice the signs as mentioned above, seek treatments immediately whether by counselling or medications. It just saddens me that these people go unnoticed and refused to seek help because of the stigmas surrounding them. And before you go all judgmental and prejudice of this depressed people, I suggest you go and educate yourself first.
The video I'm going to show you is how depression can affect a person. I hope it will somehow educate people who has no knowledge of what it's like having a depression so that they will take this seriously in the future. I find this by far an almost accurate depiction of having a depression.
This video below shows you how to live or cope with someone who is having depression. I find it very informative and hopefully it will help you understand and make living with depressed people.
No comments:
Post a Comment